Love vs arranged
People usually take sides on the subject of love and arranged marriages, on how they think which last more years or which is better because they went for that option or are planning. But nevertheless, Love marriage and arranged marriage are two routes to getting married. In love marriages, people who have mutually found each other decide amongst each other to get married whereas in arranged marriages, usually the parents or family, find and arrange their marriages. The debate comparing them both, about the best way of choosing the partner is very old and many times baseless. Why can’t both ways of getting married be beautiful?
In western countries, people laugh at the idea of arranged marriages. In India however, Marriage is not just a union of two people but a coming together of two families, many times of different traditions and culture. An arranged marriage focuses on this family union. While looking for a partner for their son or daughter, parents will first check if the potential bride or groom’s family is compatible with theirs. Do they share the same background, socio-economic status, level of education, similar values? If so, they feel they can safely marry their son or daughter into this family. Thus, Security and stability seem to be the most valued things looked for in an arranged marriage. This makes for not just a stable marriage but also one that lasts long, this could be one of the reasons why India has such a low divorce rate. But, at many times, not enough importance is given in such marriages to how the couple feels about each other. These couples get to know each other better and learn how to be happy with one another after the marriage, on the other hand, love marriages to many people seem perfect. To find your soul mate, get married, and live happily ever after. What can possibly go wrong? Yet most of the time divorces happen in such marriages. This often happens because the love in the relationship had faded away after a few years from the wedding. The once used to be love birds before the marriage was now angry birds filing for divorce. This could be because people enter love marriages with a lot of expectations.
Many times you would come across people who have been happily married for 30 or 40 or more years whose marriages were arranged. Throughout the years they got to know each other well to have a long-married life. But there are times were such marriages fail miserably and have even ended due to domestic violence. The same goes for love marriages too. They might have a happy ending or annul after a few hours. I guess the point is that there is no perfect formula to make a marriage work. Both arranged and love marriages have their own strengths and faults. It's up to the couples about how they take their journey forward and how they are able to face challenges.
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